TheSagaOfMyChestPart1..

My chest must be a travelers suitcase.
I keep it all right there.
No plans for trips.
Just stuff stuffed in more stuff.
Turkey.
Courage skipped generations.
Wish I could purge.
Just a while longer.
I can hold it.
Feel like im covered in soaked comforters.
How dare they impregnate my eyes without my permission.
And I just leak from my peripheral.
Slides across my cheek like warm oil on Her.
Plummits to my shirt and stains.
Please say you heart me.
Please.
They all left me.
Are U next?
Im sorry its so hard for me to get over my new woman still talkin to her old bitch.
Your a new kinda love for me.
The only.

ItsAllForHerHopeSheKnowsSheRockemSockemRobots. (Part I Rant)

You move though me like music.
Make my body move without rhythm.
I know U love me.
I just know it.
Moving through this life by feel.
Ive been so blind.
I want U ..Im jus so scared.
Black majic how U made those coins appear from my own ear.
I didnt even hear it comin.

and then it all dropped on me.
Surprise.
Like the combination of waves and currents.
Ive been baptised.
o0o and i see now.
Thank God.. For u.
Its urgent that U love me.
ENter me
Inahled U..
Exhale all the bad.
U cant fly cuz uve been blessed with too many wings.
Tangle ur legs in my limbs.
weave ur hairs into mine.
Ur fourth heart chamber with my first.
Conjoined.
I wana breathe when U do.
How U do.

Turned my mind off and let my Heart WOrk.

AndStiLLIStink. (No Color)

(Left the juggling to the circus.
Its so easy to stay faithful when ur inlove.
I never knew.
News to me.
The Black Rachel Maddow.)

Im in the brush.
the green is too lush,
Tryna remember what U look like.
Still fantasize about when Ur sex sounds spiked.
and then U cum.
And then U leave.
Yea.. and im alone again.
U never left money on my night stand.
But U did pay for all the meals.
I put my whole fist in U..
and U swallowed up my veins.
Took every inch of my wood.
Splinter.
I used to live in U..
Wouldve changed my skin if Ud ask.
I was so lost.
Still not found.
Im on a mission to Pluto.
To freedom.
Then Onto Venus.
All the love u said u had for me.
Left in bottles floating off the bank of Coyote Point.
My body twist like Exercistic shit.
When U left.
Withdraws to my Being.
In pools of tar.. Molasses.
Come back.
Why wasnt it me?
Her.
U chose Her..
And who will love me?
Who wants to love me?
Im not lovable..
Can barely receive hugs.
and compliments.
Nope. I dont believe.
But I nod like I do.
I practiced.
Know my angles like math formulas.
Pupils have to be wounds.
Stings too much when the tears come.
So they dont come.
Often.
U smell my familiar in the wind because I was near U.
Not a stalker.
Jus in the vicinity.
Searching for my virginity.
Have U seen Hyman?
Grab Ur torches and Ur pitch forks.
Cuz I should get back what was taken.
I know I was mistaken.
Identity issues.
They say I have one of those pussys.
God wouldnt let this happen.
Paperwork got all fucked up.
Maybe she was younger than me.
Well. Baby girl U lucked up.
I took it All..
Still Am.
Trying to find ways to be ravished.
They wont come near me.
Pheromones.
Bleach wont help.
Tomatoes I tried em..
And.
I Still.
Stink.
Just wana be loved.

Drenched.

We Lay.
Drenched.
Her Whole body shakes. 
Quakes.
Shes Thunder under my Ribs. 
Natural Disaster. 
She doesnt know how I could Love Her. 
..For the same reasons U Love Me. 
Clueless.
Us Both. 
I left My Sodium Sadness Saturating Her Sheets.
And Hers soak in My skin.
And Splash past My tasting buds.
I swallow.
Trying to Piece a Puzzle with No help.
What a Cold Play.
But I Will Try To Fix You.
I got this jones for Your Pain.
Let Me Love U.
I can take it.
Im Fucked Up Too.
No Judgements Here.
Come In.
Get Comfy. 
Take Your Soul off.
And Bare it to Me.
I want All Your Nasty.
I got Remedies and Hollistic Shit in My Love.
Im Dr. Miracle to a Black Girls nape.
Super Hero Guts. 
Lay on My couch.
Tell Me.

LittleBlackGirl..(MySistah)

For Beautiful Deep Brown Skinned Women..


Little Black Girl.
Whos skin was Sun Kissed by rays that penetrated Your Brown Skinned shelter.
You.      Are.       Beautiful.
You are Soil.
& Chocolate.
& Deep Seas.
You.
Are.
Roots.
To Our History.
Tell Me Stories.
Dont You know They Tan to Mirror You.
Baked like Chickens to have their Berries as Sweet as You.
Your Whole body Painted in Miles of Davis.
& Even Hughes Of Langston.
Damn. I Love You.
Because I Feel You.
Cried with You.
For You.
Too Many things to Worry about.
Time Ticks.
& Yep You guessed it Tocks.
Cant Hate Yourself in Graves.
I Hope You Live.
& Come from Hiding from what Blankets You.
Rind.
I mean You come from Queens.
Nefertiti.
Power.
Genius.
The Land Of Mothers.
Authenticity.
Wow.
You Amaze Me.
Amazing.
Your Blood Dazzeling.
Get In Touch.
& Palpate.
Stand on This Soap Box.
Shout it.
You Are Ebony.
Jet.
Essence.
Onyx.
I Promise.

JustIsntEnuff..

If one could hollow out the Center of the Earth and Fill it with their Love it still Wouldn't be Enough. I mean we could put My Human Heart in the Prenuptial Agreement and she would still want my car.

A woman wounded is a death to the world.
We havent learned that She makes the Trees Breathe.
O_2.
Pure and Chemical at the same Time.
Shes Queen of the Sunshine.
Ruler of Rain & Pain & Shame.
Because I swear it Rains only for Me.
He Balled his fist & Gave every little Pain to Me.
& Sometimes I still Hold my head Down Ashamed of Me.
Cycles.
Cyclones.
Left in Washing Machines on Spin.
After Youve cleaned Me, You beat Me & Then You do it All Again.
Life.
Yes I Breathe cuz She birthed the Trees.
But I still sometimes Sneeze.
Allergies.
I Forgive You.
You Heart Me like no other Ever could.
We dont Replicate Love, We just Dont Change.
Stuck.
On.
Stupid.
& The Shit we do to Prove it.
Like Id drop a Thousand tears before You Leave Me.
Sodium Puddles.
Woman You need the Quicker Thicker Picker Upper For Your Ducts.
Bounty.
& Drag Yourself to the Love Pharmacy for Bandaids & Bandages & Mending Materials.
He's No Doctor.
She's No Nurse.
Truth Hurts.
Its Unfortunate that She cant see passed Her own Memories to Gain theTruest of All L Words
 wrapped up In one Caplet.
B Complex.

AmIYourDaughter..

So Blessed to have been taught to Love by a Woman.
That Woman.
Thank You.
So Sorry you learned to Love by your Father.
He Hates You.
Hated to see me coming.
We share a face.
US.
Bowed legs.
Chuckle.
Too many tears to count.
Tsunamis.
Pillars ..She stands..Played her parts.
Daddy and Mommy.
You missed my Birthday again.
Again.
Yes Again.
Yea..so When I GROW up I Hope to be.
Nothing.
Like.
You.
Of All the things to leave on a mirror, How could You Leave your Reflection?
I mean and like.
You Ran.
Sprinter.
Leaving splinters in MY everything.
I have NO words for a man of NO Verbs.
You dont deserve to know my wealth.
My goodness.
Future Wife.
My Life.
They ALL just leave.
...You first.
Created a Path for them ALL to follow.
Venous.
She asked me how I made it through this Life.
Still havent.
Jury is still out.
Always wanted to call a man Dad.
3 simple letters.
BAD.
Luck.
Ive been on roads.
Under Rainbows and Gold.
Hues of Blues.
Purples.
Halos.
And id give it ALL back.
For Hugs.
Yours.
Sweet Cheek Kisses.
Yours.
I didnt want to but I had to move on.
You did.
I guess.
Yes.
I Am Your Daughter.
DNA.
Truth Fluid. 

NoHoldOnMyHeart..ButMyMindJustGoes..

Karma has to be a woman scorned.
Bitch.
When is it my turn to be reborn.
My life wasnt other sides of pillows too.
Whats the record for most broken hearts?
Hope She wasnt a bleeder.
Pass me those bandaids and knitting needles STAT!
Gotta mend myself.
Heal mine and her wounds.
Once again.
She's gone.
No words.
Not one letter.
Chris Browned me.
Me?
Said..I know what I want..
So..I gave it to her.
Rejection.
Intermission..
Came back..
Said..I know what I want and need..
So..I gave it..Better.
Rejection.
Another intermission..
She comes back.
Fell inlove with me.
4 times.
Failed inlove with me.
4 times.
I mean I got this shit that makes these women sick.
I must be Tussin and destruction at the same time.
Just want to know what went wrong.
Just want to know why Ur not so strong.
She became my bully.
Trying to find a way out.
Rat in the same old maze.
No need for panic.
Go.
No Hold On My Heart.

DevilNATightDress..

Girl U a Killah..
I tell Her everyday how HAPPY I am She was born.
I hope She believes ME.
I mean U shoulda seen Her in that dress.
Coulda forgave Her for anything that She will EVER do to me on sight.
Curves.
Lombard.
Ganache over Caramel.
Clevage.
Sticky buns.
Little Debbies.
She speaks.
Her lips part.
Gap like mine.
Singular dimple when She sees my reaction.
Yes.. I Love Her.
I CAN'T help it.
From the Last hug OUR first meeting.
I felt Her. Still can. Every Rib.
So hard letting Her go. She'd become apart of me. Like one of the Important parts.
I smiled the REST of the Day..
She's ART.
I put my RED sticker on Her.
Will Never put Her on display tho.
Too selfish.
She CRIES. Makes me wanna CRY.
No tears.
I Love Her. After Never being Loved.
She re-inrtoduced me to a forgotten friend.
But its coming back to me.
Heart Muscle Memory.

CantGetUOutaMyHead..

She asks herself why This keeps happening to her..
They look different but they Love me the same.
Fraternal twins I say.
Its time to check that list.
Empty that bucket.
She settles.
Sediment after hot chicken grease has calmed.
Get to know Urself and introduce U to someone super fresh.
Nomore replacements.
No under studies.
U better learn to ad lib and improv some shit.
Love is a hybrid of emotion.
Recipes for disaster.
Bodily fluid warfare.
Suit up and lace Ur boots up.
There is NO crying in Love, NO time for it.
Lists to make..plans to break.

DO U HEAR ME? I WANT U!

You want me to be what Uknow I cant be..
But U stay..
Settled ..crispy little bits at the bottom of the skillet.

I Get Lonely Too..

Im dealing.
Passing the time with Her and nothingness.
Like I said ..Im dealing.
Im learning that life has its order. Its already made. In carosel drive thru's ..Yea..can I get the number 3 with a pink lemonade?

Im layered like wedding cakes for the rich and ridiculous. I just keeep going in length and in cost.
No Refunds.
I ramble and mumble sometimes at the same time.
My foot is the perfect size for my own mouth.

I am Lesbian with no apology.
I have apologies about nothing to do with being Lesbian.
Yes..Ive been left. 
They ALL committed heart robbery.
Theft. 
I just wanna spread my wings and if  I cant fly alone..Ill float in flocks.
Got these pains and tingles in my chest.. pop rocks. 

To have been a fly on that wall.. 
Im sorry. Im so sorry.
I get in these moods to share late nights. 
Its the quiet that comforts me. The blackness. 
The depth. Like I can see but not really and I hope U dont see me too. 
I want U to be confused.
Fuzzy.

Ask About Me.